What makes me go on....

Life never stops in one problem. Life goes on. What makes life? Is it love or success? Which one of the two that makes life? Is it the love that you have been able to express, possess and feel? If you don't have it, would one's life could be something's missing? Or is it about success? Cars, firms, affilliations, compensations u get and other benefits in life. A massive house, luxuries and brands you're wearing??? What makes life? A beautiful life.


If love makes life beautiful, then what if LOVE is all you get? Financially, broke. Would one say he/she has beautiful life with full of love but struggling financially? Is love then enough? Is it just LOVE that makes life? Would one say he/she has beautiful life because he/she has been surrounded by LOVE?


Or is it about how far you have come in life? What car you drive and which neighbourhood you live. How many times you go on a holiday overseas each year, and degrees you have somewhat achieved? That makes life fabulous! But all these is worthless without someone to share with. Your loved-one. or loved-ones perhaps.


LOVE and FORTUNE. One worth nothing without the other one.

What makes me go on? Which one is rather important? I have been taught that love is far more important. Love is priceless. But as I grow older, money is what makes life. Not all the time maybe!. But sadly, yes! Money can take you places, money takes you in a better place. Money takes you in a better fortune, can get you a better car, better house, better education... with that? a better job, and sometimes, a better man comes along! Just life is so much BETTER! Some might disagree, but that's just reality. When one becomes rich and powerful, some people thinks they lack of love . They might get everything they want in life, but still, loneliness hunts them. I used to think too. But, if you would base that belief through observations, they are in fact happy! Happy with what they do, with what they have, and with what they still want to accomplish in life.


And for those who are against. They thought living in green paper is what makes one miserable. Maybe! But guess what? Like Mr. Donald Trump says, "If money makes one miserable, I'd rather be miserable with it than miserable without it". And if one might go against it, and think I've gone crazy, at least it can buy me a good therapist!


Life is not all about money. But in life, it requires money. money, money! Love is a natural feeling. Someone might say he/she knows someone who doesn't have a heart. But Love is always felt no matter how bad person they might think about him/her. There's always a story why one has gone bad. But that doesn't mean one is not able to love. It's like something we feel towards something or someone and comes out naturally. But money isn't. You work hard for it.


What makes people go on? Is it love? Or fortune? Has one gone to work and get paid by love and buy something in a grocery store with IT to survive?


What makes me go on...
my dreams, my ambitions, my loved-ones...
LOVE towards what i do, what i want to become, people I love makes makes me go on.
. . . .with money.

????

Blogging in my room... there are so may things in my head right now. And I just don't know how in words I can ellaborate them. Have I gone mad? I have lots of opportunities right in front of me, all I have to do is think of how i can improvise them. Life's good at me at the moment.. How come when I was in the relationship I think of what my life would be. How can I pull it out despite so many trials. What if I should just get out and be myself, and make it on my own? And now that I am out of that relationship and my life is so much better, I am thinkin' of what a beautiful relationship we had, of how my life would be if I was still together with him. . . which leads me to a conclusion that, why do people has no contentment...? or probably that isn't the case at all. I just miss him so much....


LIFE AS OF NOW. . .

Staying in a complex with my sister. Sharing rent:) I got a job waiting on January, and I am in my holidays, LOL. Me and my mom don't speak again with each other. I don't know but growing up not by her side kinda really draws me away, differences and we really have a bad times adjusting with each other. But life's good. I just appreciate it so much... especially having friends who have been here with me all this time. PLANS? uhmmm, do I have one right now? yeah, I got plenty in mind but plans are for myself only, haha!..


Just so thankful with my life right now. oh well, zer0 lovelife, but. . . it's okAy.
Everything happens for a reason, and I know that life has so much to offer that's why it happened. Maybe what me and my past relationship was something crazy-beautiful, but just wasn't meant to be......

TOTALLY RANDOM

..hate me for still missing you,
..when we clearly understood we are through
..for still crying deep inside without showing any tears
..and guess you don't know how that must really feel.



..i know you never meant to hurt me this way
..wish i should've prepared myself this would come one day
..'cuz living with so much hope that it'd be us in the end,
..is having an open wound,it scarred.....cut - o p e n.


..it's been quite a while now since we've been apart
..and all i do is begin where I should forget where we start
..but how would i do that when i try to recollect all these shattered pieces
..when i am picking up myself, i see me, myself and our memories.


..every song i listen to becomes our song.
..i try to keep this feeling to myself and cry when i'm alone
..pulling out a happy face so they won't see there's something wrong
..and they won't know i still love and care about you all along.



..i would want to go out at night and just be with friends
..show me a good time and this craziness might end
..i would laugh with them, agree and might nodded
..but they won't be able to see, you're at the back of my head.


..i miss you in a thousand ways.
..i long for you in a million ways.
..and its just so damn difficult to miss someone who will never come back
..i know it's the trigging reality, but still can't swallow the fact


..i know you will never come back
..i just know you don't care anymore
..i just can't let go of our memories when I constantly reminisce...
..when i know someone whose not interested is the most difficult one to please.

<

hectic...

It's almost a week now since I left Bloemfontein..
Oh well, lovin' en livin' a new life as we speak.. or write??LOL. Better yet, type???..haha!.. Anyways, enough of crap. My worrrrrdddd.. what a weekend! Was with friends, MADCHILD (shyne, me, kayesha, stephen, cherry, collin and celeste). It was so much fun. First was the housewarming just-friends-small-gathering in our complex, then had a braai and some drinkins' then off to a club. Talk about mad, like a real party-hardy madchild style,haha!.. Got home safely, thank go0dness!:)) Oh my word, like I don't wanna talk about the shits we went through just because one of us g0t blackout ova drunknessssss... my w0rrrrrrdddddd.. but n0 stress about it we g0t ova it and thats just about it, we were laughin at it afterwards...HAHAHAHA!!


Ai, life. I wonder what's in store for me afta 2 months. Yup, 2010:)

uhmmmmmmmm....

Has moved in Pretoria, last 11th of November,. I personally liked the place it just feels so homey:)) i am just so grateful with my life right now. And I just came to realize that I don't need a boyfriend at the moment. Sorry if there is someone or few that I have hurt but, I hope they (or especially there is specific one) that he must i hope extend his understanding of where I am coming from. To deal with lovelife right now is just taking another suicidal pills for me cuz it's just too much for me to take.

enough of lovelife. I just wanna stay single at the moment. and focus on rather much more important and grow!...financially, emotionally ,etc..etc. stability in life! and i will take that anyday:))


Thank googness I have learned along the way of this journey this year....:))

went to Lesotho and I had so much fun. haha:)) the details??nextime when i have much time to blog. ^___^ alam q0h nah qung sino ang 22o q0ng mahal...

gonna be a very busy day,hehe:))

9:32am, I should be getting dressed by now but I am still blogging,LOL. I'm going to Lesotho tomorrow. The next day is Christening Day of my cutie godson,hahahah!,SANTINO GABRIEL MORTERA...:)

I still need to find what I must wear and gift for my inaanak...:))

Few more days and my life is about to shift its path again... hopefully, heading to a new dreamt direction. I have added my ex on Facebook, MJ.. surprisingly he accepted it. Anyways, I hope he clearly understood that I am so over him and all the past between us is behind me. I mean, no feelings, no nothing:)

I don't know how I feel right now. I feel happy again with my life. No boyfriend but blessings keep on coming. Might not be so much but hey, I appreciate them a lot. Can't wait to see the new place :))

Anyways, I gotta hit the shower and get ready for some serious shopping!..

Be blogging again so0n:)))))

dot...dot...dot...

Phase of my life where I am just as confused as deciding to go for black or white,if you know what I mean.

Just got back from Johannesburg on the other day and slept over at Ateh Jhen's place and Khuya Mizael's. . .as we had a drinkin' session at their house the other night. Ateh Julie, Kuya Bembol, Ateh Arrah and Alvin were also there all the way from Lesotho. The next day was the birthday surprised party of Ateh Arrah for her boyfriend/fiance (who happened to be my cousin) and yeah, so we had a braai, and lotsa food in the haouse that I couldn't stop eating,LOL.


Leaving nextwek Monday for Pretoria. Finally, I am moving out, another adventure...wuho0o0o0o!.;p




oh my word!. i am moving out soon and it was just like a random decision. Oh well, it happens but i just feel like a total new experience again and people to meet. LOL.

just so great that I have managed to gain so many friends in Bloemfontein. And, Richard is just a total different story IF U MAY ASK cuz he is not a real man, lol. he can't face me like a man and he just threw everything between us like a man with no backbone!.HAHA! so0o0o, i guess i am so over that shit! finally!